I can’t really believe I am writing an article about how to turn a girl on, but many guys always ask what they can do to get a girl to like them or be interested in them and we’ve decided to fulfill this popular request.

The phrase itself  of “how to turn someone on” is kind of a strange one, and it’s likely my non American readers might have a little confusion over that. After all, it’s not as if people have “on and off” switches. So, no, it doesn’t mean literally to turn someone on – it means to make someone attracted to you, and for some this means in an intimate sense as well.

Now, the biggest problem that most guys are going to run into is a pretty common cause for concern: No two women are alike. Oh sure, there are stereotypes and maybe even some of those stereotypes will prove to be true. But for the most part, it means that you really have to be careful before you try anything, or it could be a major turn off for a lot of girls. When in doubt, just be yourself and do what comes naturally. Nobody wants a guy pretending to be one thing, especially if it is very obvious that he is not.

Ideally you’ll know a little bit about the girl. The more you know about her, the better, since you’ll be able to have a vague understanding of what she likes and dislikes. Always aim for what she likes and stay far away fro her dislikes.

That all being said, here are some of the top turn ons for girls:

1. Smell Good: I used to work with a guy that had such a good smelling cologne that it wafted all through the place and almost every girl there would swoon over him. Sure, he was kind of tall dark and handsome so maybe that had a little to do with it, but that smell was an instant attraction method. Many times I would be part of a conversation where several girls were all talking about how good he smelled. There are all types of colognes out there and some girls will like some more than others. But smelling good is typically enough to at least get her positive attention.

2. Play With Kids: I am not sure if it has something to do with a natural maternal instinct that occurs in a lot of females, but a lot of girls like to see their guys playing with kids. It doesn’t mean they want or need kids, but for some seeing you play with kids will instantly melt their heart.

3. Show Some Tears: Most guys I know wouldn’t ever want anybody to see them cry. And that’s exactly why there is something very intimate and sensitive about it. You don’t want to cry all the time (this would make them think what the heck’s wrong with you?) but a well thought out soul baring moment with a genuine tear or two can make a girl go wild about you.

4. Tease a Little: Everybody wants what they can’t have, right? And the longer you have to wait can make you want it even more. While you want to be careful not to play too hard to get, just trying to take things slow can drive a girl crazy and want to be with you more and more. It may be hard to exercise the self control, but showing how much you respect her and not pressuring anything physical from her can really go a long way.

5. Gentle Touch: Holding her hand, lightly touching her back, cuddling together – all these things can make some women want you. This is something you should probably only do if you’re already starting to date or have been together for awhile – otherwise it might be a little strange.

6. Ask Her: If you’re dating somebody, then you should be comfortable in asking them what their turn ons are. If you have trouble talking about it, then it could mean that you’re not really ready for an intimate relationship. The best way, and the only way to know for sure, is to ask the person themselves, since as I mentioned before no two people are alike.

While I can’t guarantee that any of these will help you to learn how to turn on a girl, hopefully they will help you get some ideas.  Getting to know someone better is the best way to learn and decide what will help them be naturally attracted to you.

Intimacy is a term that is often used loosely and to different people means different things. Many people mistake it for being only the physical aspect of the relationship, though it equally includes the importance of emotional closeness as well. While most couples in a sexless marriage are those most likely to be aware of their intimacy issues, they can happen to anyone in any circumstances.

It’s not easy to know what causes it to be difficult to establish or continue closeness with our partners. It can be a variety of factors, from simply being too busy to make each other a priority, to having deep harbored feelings of resentment toward one another.

In order to resolve problems with intimacy, you must first strengthen the emotional and spiritual connection between you and your partner. Passion is not going to spring out of nowhere if you feel like the person you are with is a stranger or have bottled up feelings of anger. Once you have the emotion and spiritual connection established you can then move on to repairing the physical side of your relationship.

Here are some ways you can improve the emotional connection between you and your partner:

Talk to Each Other: This may seem like an obvious one, but many partners don’t find the time to talk to each other about things that are beyond the day to day scope of living together. Discussing things such as beliefs, emotions, and feelings can all help. There’s a great ebook called 1000 Questions for Couples that will get you talking to each other again with tons of ideas as well as a few special bonuses. Our article on Conversation Starters may also get you started in the right direction.

Get Away: Sometimes taking a much needed break or going on a marriage retreat can be enough to help restore intimacy. A change of surroundings can make a huge difference, so don’t be afraid to plan a romantic getaway and see if that helps you reconnect with one another.

Understand Yourself and Your Beliefs: Sometimes finding a deeper emotional connection needs to begin with yourself. If you’ve neglected your spiritual self, there’s a chance your relationship is neglected as well. Everyone has their own individual beliefs when it comes to spirituality, but I’m a big fan of the things author Deepak Chopra has written about. His book The Path to Love: Spiritual Strategies for Healing is one that may be of benefit of you if you’re looking for something bigger than religion.

Learn How to Disagree: It’s natural to not agree with everything your partner says or does 100% of the time. Learning argue effectively can make a huge difference between disagreeing and arguing with one another.

Be More Giving: When in a relationship for a long time, we tend to stop thinking of our partner’s needs and focus only on our own. This can cause a lot of distance and strain on a relationship, which is why it’s important that both you and your partner give to each other equally. The more you give to your partner, it is likely the more you will receive.

How to Improve Physical Intimacy

After you’ve worked on improving your emotional and spiritual closeness, the next thing to do is work on your physical closeness. Here are some ideas to help you break through walls that may be built between you:

Be Spontaneous: If you’ve fallen into routine or have lost that “when we first magic”, being more spontaneous can help. Kiss your partner for no reason at all when they least expect it is one small example of something that would be very easy to do.

Hold Hands: Holding hands is a great way to reconnect with your partner and increases the emotional physical bond between the two of you. It doesn’t matter if you’re taking a walk, laying in bed, or just sitting together watching TV. It’s another easy little way to improve intimacy.

Massage: The power of a good massage can speak volumes. Take a couples massage class together, or simply spend some time massaging each other. Physical touch, without it being necessarily sexual, is a great way to improve intimacy.

While doing these things will likely help with improving the closeness between you and your partner, don’t be afraid to ask for help if they don’t. Not every couple is able to reconnect easily on their own, especially if problems such as communication issues or if other situations have added stress to the relationship. Attending a marriage seminar or marriage counseling together may be an excellent option if nothing else seems to work. Our article on help for a sexless marriage may also give you some added insight.

Do you have any ideas or thoughts for improving and resolving intimacy issues? Share your thoughts in the comments below.

You May Also Be Interested In:

• 500 Lovemaking Secrets
• What Husbands Can’t Resist
• Better Sex For Christians
• Fix Your Sexless Marriage