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Resolving Trust Issues

August 9, 2012
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We all like to be in a relationship only as long as it’s pleasant, as long as it’s making us happy. No matter what we say, we enter into a relationship and stay in one only and only for us. We enter into a relationship because we want to feel loved, to feel wanted, to be taken care of, etc. We stay in it as long as we get happiness from it. We wouldn’t stay in it just to keep someone else happy, even if we are not interested at all.

To keep a relationship healthy and interesting, there are certain things which must be done by both partners. That will ensure that the relationship gives both partners happiness and hence, would usually last long. One of the things we cannot afford to do is to take things for granted, we must always be active and seeking methods to improve the relationship.

One issue that usually crops up is the trust issue. It happens with most couples worldwide. It is natural for both partners to be possessive about each other and be jealous in certain circumstances. A trust issue usually crops up when one of the partners gets exceedingly close to another person of the opposite sex, other than the partner. Suppose a guy Mark has a best friend Alice, a girl. Then Kate, Mark’s girlfriend might have trust issues regarding Mark and Alice, and may not be too fond of their relationship. This leads to fights, causes insecurity and may even lead to breakups. There are certain things you must change in order to keep the relationship healthy. These compromises may be small but they do the relationship a world of good.

What to expect:

First and foremost, we might as well change the way we look at things around us. When we see our partner becoming very close to somebody else, we should not get hyper about it. Imagine how you’d feel if you were talking to your childhood best friend and your new girlfriend asks you not to. We should give them adequate personal space. If there are visible signs that your partner is falling for a new attraction, sit down and talk about it. It could be a colleague at work or somebody similar who gets too close to your partner. You should have a talk with your partner first and then sit down with both of them and have a chat. If possible, try to be good friends with the other person. That will help you know each other better and reduce the jealously and insecurity.

What to do:

One should not let people anyone interfere in their private spaces too much, but they should also draw a line. One should understand that the partner might get insecure by the one’s actions. Hence, if your colleague has invited you to her house for some work, and it gets really late and she asks you to stay back, RESIST the temptation. While there may be nothing that would happen between the both of you, your partner wouldn’t like it that you’ve spent the night at her place, and this might make her insecure. Hence, if possible, one should try to avoid things that sow the seeds of mistrust.

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