When something is broken, most of us will do one of two things. We’ll either toss it to the curb, or we’ll try to repair it back to working the way it should again. When a marriage is broken, your choices are basically to either end the relationship through separation and divorce or to try to reconcile with your spouse to get it back to where it should be.
All too often, marriages are undervalued. When a marriage is broken, separation and divorce seem like a solution. But a marriage is not a toaster you can replace with a new one for $19.99. Most marriages are irreplaceable – something rare and handmade in a world of disposable electronics. Marriages are not something mass produced that you can find at your local retail store. They are usually something lovingly handcrafted, with much energy and time put into them. When you throw away your marriage, you’re not just ending a relationship – you’re losing all of the time and energy you’ve already invested into it. These are just some of the reasons to reconcile a marriage.
One of the most popular resources available online for reconciling your marriage (or any relationship for that matter) is The Magic of Making Up. It’s a step by step guide on getting your relationship back on track, whether divorced, separated, or just on the verge of breaking up – even if your partner isn’t talking to you.
When you see your marriage as an investment, and as something worth saving, it only makes sense to invest in something to help you get it back on track. If a light bulb is burnt out, you don’t throw away the lamp – you just need to buy another light bulb. If you think of the various self help programs out there or even marriage counseling as a light bulb, it’s an investment that will bring much light into your relationship for many more years to come. No new light bulb, and you might as well throw away the lamp and your relationship.
We usually associate the word reconcile with forgiveness and apologizing – but it goes much deeper than just that. Reconcile also means to bring two things closer together once again, it means to resolve, and it means acceptance. If you want to get everything back to its right place, you need more than just an apology. The Magic of Making Up teaches why apologies, promising to change, and begging for a second chance DON’T work – and instead teaches you the important principles of reconciliation that DO work.
If you want to reconcile your relationship you need to do these things:
Resolve and Settle Relationship Problems: Resolving problems for most couples is the hardest part, especially if it only escalates into fighting and more problems. To fix your marriage, you need a clean slate, which means resolving, settling, and letting go of all of the things driving you apart.
Bring Yourself to Acceptance: No one is perfect, we all have flaws. Your husband or your wife is not the latest and greatest Spouse-O-Matic 3000. You can’t control or change your partner – but you can change your own actions.
Become Close Again: Reconnecting is probably the hardest part. How do two people barely speaking to one another fall back in love? It can be done however, when you are willing to try positive interactions to get back the bond you once had.
Be Consistent: It’s not going to do either of you any good to fix something for a short term period. Once you figure out the way to resolve your problems and become close again, you need to keep doing those things in order to stay happy.
If you’re asking yourself if separated couples can reconcile, the answer is yes! There are many ways to reconcile after a divorce or separation. Your marriage does not need to go out to the curb. You can recoup all of the energy, time, and resources to get it all back. Don’t throw out a perfectly good lamp when all you need is a new light bulb! When you understand the true meaning of what it means to reconcile with your spouse, you’re on your way to getting everything back to the way it should be for a happier and healthier relationship.