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Signs That Your Boyfriend is Lying to You

April 13, 2009

If you’ve ever wondered if your guy is telling the truth or not, these signs that your boyfriend is lying can come in handy. While it’s nice to believe that your relationship is built on trust and honesty, there is a good liklihood that your boyfriend will lie to you at some point or another. The difference will be if he is lying about something small (no honey, you don’t look terrible in that dress!) or if he is lying about something major such as cheating or covering up something that might make you angry if you knew about it. White lies as they are called can often be considered harmless, even if they do make you end up feeling hurt if you do find out the truth. However, consistent dishonesty and covering up very important things could be a sign of bigger and future problems in your relationship.

There are a few things that can help you tell if someone is lying to you. The clues can range from anything from their body language to an inconsistency in things they say. Some people may not outright lie by telling you something that is not true – others may be dishonesty by not telling you anything at all. While some will argue that leaving out information is not being deceitful, in most cases it is.

Here are some of the signs that your boyfriend could be lying to you:

No Eye Contact: Very few people can look someone straight in the eye and boldly lie and maintain that eye contact. The person may look at your chin or your forehead, or even not towards you at all. Others may glance up and down to kind of see if you are believing their story or not. You’ll want to consider what is a normal level of eye contact that your boyfriend makes on a regular basis as well – not everyone is good at giving others a lot of eye contact.

Dilated Pupils: This is another way the eyes can give you signs of a liar. Generally speaking more people will have dilated pupils when telling a lie than when they are just speaking naturally. This means the dark center part of their eyes will be bigger than normal. Other things can affect this also however, such as going from light to dark, which is perfectly natural, to using various medications and drugs.

Fidgeting: Many people squirm when they are nervous or uncomfortable about saying something. If they are fidgeting with something when they are talking to you or can’t seem to sit still, it could be a clue that something is up. On the other hand, if they are extremely rigid it could also be another sign. Consider what is “normal” for your partner and compare it to how they are acting when you think they may not be telling the truth.

Lack of Detail: Very few liars, unless they’ve had a lot of time to think of an elaborate story, will go to great lengths to describe detail. If you asked questions about specific things, such as “What color shirt were you wearing?” they may not be able to tell. (Though not everyone is attentive to detail – so this by itself may or may not be a clue) Too much detail can also be a sign – few people would recollect for example what direction the wind was blowing.

Pausing: If there is a lot of pausing it could be a sign that he is trying to recollect the story before saying it or that they could simply be trying to make up an excuse.

Inconsistency: Asking your boyfriend to repeat a story can be one way to see if there are any inconsistencies, or you may even be able to simply notice something that doesn’t seem to match up. Chances are if the story is different or if there are conflicting details, there’s a good chance he is not being honest with you.

Defensiveness: When someone is being accused of lying or caught in not telling the truth, they will usually become very defensive and even quite possibly turn everything around on you.

Convincing Language: If your boyfriend uses the words honestly, truthfully, or other similiar words excessively it could be another sign that you may need to be suspicious. We don’t usually in everyday conversation need to emphasize these words to make a case.

There are no true fool proof ways to know if someone is telling the truth to you or not. However, these signs that your boyfriend is lying may be able to help you tell. Our previous articles on Can I Trust My Boyfriend? and Signs of Cheating may be able to give you additional insight and help you make the decision if you’re dating a liar or not – and what to do about it.

Have any thoughts? Share them in the comments below!

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