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How to Tell if a Guy is Attracted to You

November 3, 2008


Is he flirting? Shy? Just being polite? How to tell if a guy is attracted to you? It’s one of the first questions that pops into your mind when you first meet someone new and think of them as a potential date interest.

Before I continue with this post it’s worth mentioning that not all guys are alike and the signals that a guy likes you may not all be the same. Some guys might be a little shy or a little more outgoing than others. I’ve known guys who would hug and seemingly flirt with every girl they met – but not actually attracted to any of them. On the same note, I’ve seen guys painfully hide their attraction to a girl in fear of rejection or a jealous boyfriend getting the wrong idea. Nevertheless, there are typically a few “standard” ways on how to tell if a guy is attracted to you.

Here are some signs on how to tell if a guy is attracted to you:

Eye Contact: Eye contact can be tricky sometimes. If he’s completely engaged in conversation with you and maintains constant eye contact, there’s a good chance he is interested in you. But on the same token, some guys are just very friendly. But 9 out of 10 guys you can probably count on constant eye contact meaning they at least want to be good friends with you. Then there’s also the common game of “eye tag” where your eyes meet and then he quickly looks away only to look back at you again. If this goes on a few times over the course of the night, it’s a good possibility he might just be shy or nervous, but does possibly have an interest in you.

Trying to Impress You: If a guy seems like he is trying to give you a good impression, it’s a good chance that he might be attracted to you – otherwise why would he care what you think of him? This isn’t the case all of the time, but there’s a pretty good chance that if he’s going out of his way to make a good impression it means he could be attracted to you. If in doubt, see how he acts around you in various settings and situations.

Nervousness: If you’re out with a group of people and it seems like he is nervous, even if he’s surrounded by some of his closest friends there’s a good possibility that he might be interested in somebody. If he’s fidgeting, or stumbling over what he is saying, it could be a signal that he likes you.

He Uses Your Name A Lot: You can sometimes tell that a guy likes you if he uses your name a lot. He might be talking about you to others or in conversation repeatedly uses your name when others typically wouldn’t. It could be a subconscious sign that he’s thinking about you. (Unless you notice he is just one of those “name people” and says everybody’s name at the beginning or end of every sentence)

He Calls You: Guys typically won’t waste their time calling a girl they don’t like, even if she happens to have the magic secret recipe to make a million dollars in a hour. They might have an excuse – but if they stay on the phone with you longer past the “reason” he called, its a good chance he’s very interested. If it’s strictly business on the phone, there’s a good chance it’s just for whatever reason it was – but if he calls again it might be that he was just too nervous the first time.

Body Language Signals: There are several body language signals that a guy likes you. He might casually touch you and not immediately knee jerk away (such as if your legs bump underneath a table) or he may pat you on the back or ask for high fives excessively. You’ll also notice he might turn himself directly towards you or mirror your own body language.

His Friends: Sometimes a guy’s friends will be able to clue you in that he might be attracted to you. They might make some jokes or comments or maybe all coincidentally make it so that you and him are always seated beside one another. OR if someone does take a seat next to you they might make a big deal of getting you or that person to move. I don’t really know if guys do this intentionally or not, but if his friends suddenly start acting strange, it could be that they already know he likes you.

Obviously, all guys are different, and not all have the same way of expressing whether they like a girl or not. This research has been done by me in several settings where I knew a certain guy liked a certain girl and these were the signals I picked up on. Trust your instincts and if you think he might like you, the worst that could happen is you can is start dropping subtle little hints or make time to start seeing more of each other to see if a friendship and possibly a relationship later may develop.

What do you think? Do you have any sure-fire ways how to tell if a guy is attracted to you? Share them in the comments below

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Chelle is a freelance writer and married to the funniest guy in the world, mom of some cute crazy kids, and write mostly from my own experiences in love and relationships.

11 Responses to How to Tell if a Guy is Attracted to You

  1. kouji@nature haiku poems on November 3, 2008 at 9:28 pm

    hmmm… you appear to have covered all the bases here…

    i think that if a guy’s looking for information on you, whether it be him calling you, or maybe asking questions about you when he’s with your friends, then he’s probably into you.

    koujis last blog post..obama mccain american election haiku poem

  2. Donace on November 5, 2008 at 10:51 am

    an interesting view point indeed; I think women read to much into the ‘little signs’ in my experience … if a guy likes you he will say so!..that may also mean he goes the ‘extra mile’ if he hasn’t told you yet.

  3. Esthetic Equipment on November 10, 2008 at 9:59 am

    Those are really cool thoughts. Guys are very expressive so, its easy to find out if a guy likes you. He will show it to you.

  4. bleuken@Busby SEO Test on November 11, 2008 at 5:37 am

    In our country, when we introduce the girl to our parents it means that we already seriously and definitely fall in love with the girl and willing to marry her. :)

    bleukens last blog post..Busby SEO Test Statistics

  5. Hardy on November 11, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    Nice list. I think you have to take the guy himself into consideration. Confident guys would give you more eye contact. But less confident guys may make less eye contact.

    Hardys last blog post..TIGI Rockaholic

  6. Crystal @ Ionic Hair Straightener on November 13, 2008 at 5:12 pm

    I don’t know about guys telling the girl that they are interested. They don’t always do that right off the bat or even after some time passes with the two being friends. Some guys are just really shy, of they want the girl to let them know first! So ladies have to pay particular attention to those “little signs”. I personally (I am female), would just ask and get it over with. At least like a really big nudge in that direction.

    Crystals last blog post..Mineral Face Makeup

  7. Geoff@Florida Palm Beach Real Estate on November 14, 2008 at 10:28 pm

    I think nervousness plays a big role in it. If I see a beautiful girl there I’m much less likely to approach her than I would be a girl I didn’t find beautiful.

  8. shine on November 20, 2008 at 3:44 am

    indeed those signs are true but i hate when men become trying hard just to impress me..or maybe im just hard to please..lol

    shines last blog post..From dNeero-ites about Christmas

  9. maru@tratar acne on February 20, 2009 at 2:22 pm

    good advice to check if a man is attracted to you, but sometimes are so difficult to understand the men, it is impossible realize what they want!

  10. Stephen@It's Just Lunch on February 20, 2009 at 3:32 pm

    If he’s looking at your butt, his attraction goes beyond just liking you. This is often viewed as rude behavior, however is telling.

  11. Jay@Indie Filmmaking on March 17, 2009 at 5:57 pm

    Those are all true about guys most of the time; you’re very perceptive! So since you’re a female, how about a post on how to tell if a girl likes a guy? If you don’t already have one somewhere, that is…