I Would Love You Even if You Were An Alligator
Chelle |
Imagine if somehow by magic tomorrow your partner turned into an alligator. Would you be terrified if you woke up to see an alligator laying in your bed? Or would you roll over and kiss them like you do every morning?
Your partner as an alligator still has all of the same personality characteristics. Except now he or she can’t talk, weighs around 800 pounds, and is 13 feet long. Assume he/she won’t eat you because the he/she still loves you. Would you stick by your partner or be packing up your belongings?
I’m sure no one will be turning into an alligator tomorrow morning. But this question illustrates a very important point: Can you stick through it with your partner no matter what happens?
We encounter many difficult situations in our daily lives. There are the usual stresses of finances, balancing work, taking care of the kids…then there are things that may or may not be in our control that will turn your whole life upside down in the blink of an eye: a major car accident, diagnosis of a terminal illness, loss of a job, alcoholism or drug abuse, natural disasters and the like. We see these things on the news all the time: What do you do when they happen to you?
If your partner were to become paralyzed for example, your whole dynamic of life would be different. You may need to alter your home or even move into a new home completely. You would have to care for things your partner used to. Your sex life and the way you would communicate would change drastically as well.
When we get married, it is usually in our vows “in sickness and in health, for better or for worse…” and yet the moment worse comes around the corner we feel like running away. It is very difficult for either partner to be strong in time of crisis. And when life is going smoothly, we rarely worry about these things happen. Unfortunately, that’s often when they do – completely catching us off guard and throwing our emotions into the tilt-a-whirl ride at the amusement park.
This is why it is so very important to know how you would handle a crisis or emergency situation before it happens. It is also a very good test in knowing if your partner is someone you should marry or can love forever no matter what happens. A strong relationship will survive anything. A weak one will crumble at the hint of disaster.
So look closely at your partner next time you see him or her. Imagine they are an alligator. Think how everyday would be different forever. What tactics would you use to make sure you stay in love then? Would you give your alligator a bath? Scratch it’s tummy? Feel resentful now you are responsible for all of the household chores? Be aggravated that you have to feed the alligator or it can’t watch the kids anymore? Would you use humor to get through the difficult time? Seek counseling? Cry your eyes out each night?
If you would still love your partner if he or she became an alligator, then you can be confident you have what it would take to survive a catastrophe. Be thankful for every day and moment you have together.
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6 Responses to “I Would Love You Even if You Were An Alligator”
By Ellie on Apr 17, 2008 | Reply
This is really a fabulous idea. I think the various counslers who talk to people before getting married should advise their clients to do this exercise.
By Sunduvan on Apr 17, 2008 | Reply
Ok I am willing to be an aligator to marry you. Hahaha Just kidding. Thanks for visiting my blog.
Sunduvan’s last blog post..I Found The Answer About HostGator.
By Marc Basile on Apr 17, 2008 | Reply
This reminds me of a true story I read many years ago. Some of the finer points of the story have faded with time, but the essentials (as I recall them) are as follows:
The subject of the story is a man, married, with children and a good job. Unfortunately, this gentleman suffered a run of bad luck to rival anything that Hollywood could dream up. He was the victim of a series of accidents that left him in a wheelchair, and badly disfigured by burns over a significant portion of his body. He lost his job, and his wife left him. The costs of medical treatment wiped him out financially. He had turned into your alligator.
I sometimes wonder if, as time passes, we forget the person we fell in love with, and instead start getting hung up on other issues, issues that by comparison are trivial. The reason that I say that is the end of the story: the gentleman in question was possessed of a “never say die” attitude. his personal motto could well have been “can do”, for despite all the tragedy and misfortune that befell him, he didn’t stop.
In addition to all his woes, daily life became a nightmare. Because of his wheelchair, he couldn’t even get into the bank to cash his pension checks. Taking his can do attitude, he got busy, eventually convincing the American government to draft new laws, laws that guarantee that any disabled person can access banks, hospitals and government buildings. He is the man responsible for the wheelchair ramps we now take for granted on virtually every public building that needs one.
Perhaps if his wife had remembered that the man she had married was a man of strength and conviction, rather than just a means to pay the bills and look good doing it, she might have thought twice about divorcing him.
Excellent post, Chelle
Marc Basile’s last blog post..Young at Heart
By Chelle on Apr 17, 2008 | Reply
Ellie you have a great point - this is definately something to ask yourself before making the commitment.
I’m sorry Sunduvan, it is too late so becoming an alligator would do you little good!
Marc that is a very sad and yet at the same time inspring story - thank you so much for sharing it here!
By Jillian on Apr 19, 2008 | Reply
I also think it’s important to not fall in love with the potential of your partner, but to remain grounded in reality. Pay close attention to who they are not and not who they could be. I think a lot of people get caught up in thinking about what could and should happen, they forget the important thing is what IS happening! Anyways, awesome post.
Jillian’s last blog post..The Case of the Missing Propyhlactic
By Chelle on Apr 20, 2008 | Reply
You are right about that Jillian!